Kindergartners...

Teaching kindergarten I think I have a new story every day. I need to do better at writing them down because someday I am going to make a book of the funny things they say and retire rich! So here are my two favorite of the year.

A few weeks ago a little boy and girl were arguing and they didn't know I was listening.

Girl: You better be nicer to me or I'm going to tell Jesus.

Boy: You can't tell Jesus.

Girl: Oh yes I can in my prayers tonight.

Boy: Well I don't even care about Jesus.

Girl: K then I will tell Santa Clause.

This got the whole group in on the whole conversation and the boy was really concerned she was going to tell Santa!

The next funny story just happened today and being pregnant and not feeling great about my appearance, I still don't know how to take this from a 5 year old. I haven't told my class that I am pregnant yet because they don't understand why I don't have a big belly so I thought I would wait a few more weeks but...
I noticed a little girl that had really rosy cheeks and a rash all over her body. I know about the disease called fifths disease and these are all the symptoms. It is also a really dangerous disease for pregnant people. So I called her mom to see if she knew what was wrong with her and it was indeed fifths disease. I told her I was pregnant and it is a dangerous disease for pregnant people. Turns out it is only contagious before the rash begins so she came back to school today. Apparently her mom told her that I was pregnant and the little girl decided she would whisper the news in everyones ear when they got to school today. I finally figured out what she was telling everyone and began to listen to what they were saying. She told one boy whose response was "Oh, so that is why she is getting fat!"